Unknown Callers: If I Don’t Know the Number, I Won’t Answer the Phone
Does anyone answer their telephone these days?
I sure don’t. Most of the time I won’t even answer my phone when I know the caller. Don’t take the brush off personally, my friends. I don’t discriminate. Everyone who imposes on my time with an unexpected interruption gets treated the same — like shit.
Take some advice: If you want to talk to me on the phone, text me first. Let me know who you are and the reason for your call. If your inquiry is deemed important enough, we’ll make an appointment and talk later. However, if you owe me money, absolutely disregard this advice. I’ll pick up instantly.
The last time I answered an anonymous phone call was probably sometime during the last century, and I’m still paying for that goddammed timeshare.
Seriously now, I can’t remember the last time I picked up a phone call from a blocked caller-ID or from a name I didn’t recognize. My reasoning is simple. Why answer? The inquiry can’t possibly be anything good.
Think about it. The odds are, it’s either: (1) trying to sell me something, (2) getting me to vote for someone, or (3) attempting to scam me. Maybe all three. Either these unwanted phone calls are a scam or else I’m going to end up in prison for ignoring the IRS. which I hear is the latest hot scam — scaring people with an IRS lien. Pay the “agent” instantly with Moneygram transfer, or lose everything. The thing is, the joke’s on you, pal. Many of my possessions are leased, borrowed, or not worth anything. Except for the wine collection.
The latest telephone call fad is the stimulus check scam. An anonymous caller phones, usually in the middle of the day, and says there’s been a mistake. Since you’re helping them out with their “investigation,” a much larger payment is promised. You are instructed to transfer money to the fake agent, and in return, you’re promised a “reward.” I guess some people fall for it, or this scam wouldn’t be so popular. It’s yet another reincarnation of the old “Pigeon Drop” hustle.
Unfortunately, my blockade against incoming calls to my smartphone doesn’t stop the calls that come into my landline, which really does beg the question — why the fuck do I still use a landline?
Oh, that’s right. I still use a landline just in case the smartphone isn’t working. That way, I won’t miss any calls from the fake IRS agent.