Fireworks for Commies
President Xi Jinping and the Chinese Communist Party wish to thank all those moronic American “patriots” who will blow a whopping $800 MILLION this year buying and then shooting off CHINESE-MADE fireworks.
More than 90 percent of all fireworks purchased by Americans are MADE IN CHINA.
So, blast away, flag wavers! Show your love for Chin…..err, ahh, ‘Murica.
Go ahead. Frighten your pets. Terrorize wildlife. Risk starting fires and burning down your neighbor’s house. Disturb the whole neighborhood. Especially at 1:30 am. Do it — be a childish selfish prick.
Visit that fireworks stand made out of plywood scraps in the strip mall parking lot run by the meth-addicted ex-con. Reach deep into your pockets. Look at all those illegal noise blasters and fire hazards! Buy! Buy! Buy!
Then, ship that money overseas! China thanks you.
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