Hey, College Football — You F*cked Up (Again)

HEY, COLLEGE FOOTBALL POLL RANKINGS…..
YOU FUCKED UP! (AGAIN!)

I despise college football. I really do.

I loathe the NCAA, especially all the leeches bloodsucking the players–most of all coaches, administrators, and do-nothing “bowl committees.” Sure, I’ll bet on this cesspool of corruption. But I’ll never respect a “sport” where teams haven’t played a single game yet, and somehow they’re ranked. Serious question: How can anyone say one team is better than another given that no player has even taken a snap yet?

Well, they fucked up. Again. The first game of the new season was played yesterday, and the college football “experts” fucked up. Yeah, you fucked up, NCAA.

Again.

Florida State was a top-ten team. Or–so the college football rankings said they were. They played against Georgia Tech on Saturday, an unranked team. Florida State was also favored by double digits. Final Score: Georgia Tech 24….Florida State 21.

Anyone who had Florida State as the #10 team should lose their vote. Period. End of discussion. They fucked up, proving once again college football rankings are absolute garbage. So, why exactly is this a thing? Why do sports media and the public pay attention to rankings? Most important–where’s the accountability? Why is this corrupt system (that’s ultimately used in picking national championship finalists) allowed to continue?

How can anyone take college football rankings seriously? How can anyone say the #6 team is really better than the #7 team? It seems to me the only purpose for college football rankings is stirring controversy and stoking debate. But the worst injustice of all is that poll rankings act as staggered starting point. If two teams end up with identical records at the end of the season (and there are many teams with identical records), you know the team that started with higher ranking will end up higher in the poll. This isn’t a sport. It’s worse than letting judges to score the results in an Olympic ice skating event, and just as crooked.

Ranking teams might be interesting from a fan perspective. But using this absurd system to ultimately factor in as the “playoff system” lacks any credibility.

Oh, and a final thought: Someone should make a college football ranking parody of the classic Scarface confrontation scene:

TONY: Every dog has his day. You had Florida State ranked #10, Mel. You fucked up.
MEL: Take it easy, Tony. Everyone thought they were going to be good.
TONY: Yeah, but you fucked up, Mel. [BOOM!]
MEL: Wait, I can fix this! Hold on a minute! It’s not too late! We can stick in Georgia Tech at #10.
TONY: Sure Mel, maybe you can hustle up one of those first-class tickets to the resurrection. So long, Mel. Have a good trip.
MEL: Fuck you!!!!

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