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Posted by on Mar 21, 2021 in Blog, Movie Reviews, Sports Betting | 1 comment

Worst Gambling Movies #21 (Uncut Gems)

 

 

The “Worst Gambling Movies of All Time” series continues with #21 — “Uncut Gems.”

Title and Year:  Uncut Gems (2019)  

Director:  Josh and Benny Safdie

Actors:  Adam Sandler, Kevin Garnett

Synopsis:  Adam Sandler, cast totally opposite his typical light comedy stereotype, plays a scumbag jeweler and gambling addict who buries himself in debt and scandal.

 

Uncut Gems, starring Adam Sandler, may have transformed the box-office buffoon into a bona fide actor, but the preposterous portrayal of sports gambling makes viewing an excruciating test of patience and endurance.  This is especially true for anyone who understands sports betting.

Indeed, several cringeworthy inaccuracies make this film virtually unwatchable (full disclosure here — I hit the pause button twice before successfully making it through to the end).  Combined with gratuitous violence and ceaseless profanity, the movie never lets up.  It’s stressful to watch.  There’s not a single character with any redeeming qualities nor anyone to cheer for.  I wonder — is it possible to root for a natural gas explosion and wipe out the entire cast?  Now, that might have been a great movie and crowd-pleaser.

Alleged funnyman Adam Sandler plays a very different kind of role.  He’s a scumbag framed in Gold and Wood designer eyeglasses who works as a gemstone dealer in New York’s shady diamond district.  From his reckless gambling habits, he sinks deeper into financial trouble, then makes a number of nosebleed-level sports wagers to try and get out of the hole.  I’ll leave out the details so as not to divulge any spoilers.  But all fates here are as predictable as they are sealed from the start.

Everything related in any way whatsoever to sports betting in the movie is wrong and/or implausible. It either couldn’t or wouldn’t, happen. Not ever.

Consider the first high-stakes wager made by Sandler’s character, Howard Ratner. He bets a six-leg parlay that’s so preposterous in so many different aspects that it renders the entire episode a farce. Unfortunately, this is critical to the story’s plausibility.

Ratner bets on the NBA’s Boston Celtics to “win the opening tipoff.” If anyone has seen any licensed sportsbook anywhere in the world allow betting on the “tipoff” of a basketball game, please e-mail me. I’d like to hear about it.

But that’s the least of the multitude of absurdities. Ratner is allowed to bet on the Celtics in the first half (money line), the point spread (-1), and three individual player props related to the star player, Kevin Garnett (who appears in the movie). Please, no jokes about garnet, the name of a rare gemstone.

There’s no sportsbook or bookie, anywhere, legal or illegal, offshore or stateside, that would allow any bettor to wager on a six-leg parlay of this kind. It simply wouldn’t be possible. It’s laughable.

“I know of no book, legal or illegal, that would accept this parlay. For one thing, I’ve never seen a book that allows parlays on player props, let alone something like the tip-off. And that’s not the only reason you couldn’t get action on this bet. Another problem is that these propositions are correlated to some degree. Books shun correlated parlays, and for good reason.”  (Blair Rodman-sports gambler)

So, why couldn’t scriptwriters simply have Ratner make a large bet that was realistic?

Ignorance? Confusion? Laziness? Who knows?

Wait, there’s more.  The dumpster fire burns for two hours and includes something called a “lightning bet,” a term I’ve never heard in all of my 40 years of being involved in sports gambling all over the country. Rodman, who’s been around gambling since the early 1980s, and who was equally appalled by the film, had never heard this term either.

This film isn’t just fiction. It’s a farce.

However, let’s cut gems some slack.  Let’s agree movies should, and perhaps must either, add, subtract, alter, and exaggerate things.  So-called “creative license” can boost our interest.  The trouble is, Uncut Gems doesn’t merely add, subtract, alter, or exaggerate. It obliterates reality.

There’s another preposterous scene late in the film when Ratner’s girlfriend drives to the Mohegan Sun Casino (in Connecticut) to make a multi-leg parlay wager. Most parlays are capped at perhaps a few thousand dollars, at most. Never mind that Connecticut didn’t have legalized sports wagering in 2012 when this film is set. The errors just keep on piling up.

Somehow, the girlfriend hoists a huge bag of money to the casino where the wager is accepted without batting an eye. Rodman again best sums up the absurdity of the situation:

“…. she just dumped a bag containing about $165K on the counter to make the last parlay, and the book accepted it, and paid it off when it won with no questions and no Cash Transaction Report (CTR).”

What Rodman is referring to is a CTR, which is standard practice on all cash transactions over a certain amount (usually $10,000 in cash). Instead, Ratner’s girlfriend makes the bet and cashes the ticket like she’s picking up a Grande Latte at Starbucks.

Uncut Gems reportedly cost $45 million to make. If the filmmakers had a raw diamond worth $45 million, wouldn’t they at least hire a professional gem cutter instead of winging it themselves?

Why didn’t these scriptwriters (the Safdie Brothers) and/or production company consult someone with experience and expertise who might have provided some sense of guidance? Surely, there were (and are) hundreds, if not thousands, of professionals connected to the sports gambling scene who could have saved this film from embarrassment.

Some advice: When making a film about sports betting, hire a real sports bettor.

Worst Gambling Movies

#22 — Lay the Favorite (2012)

#23 – The Cooler (2003)

#24 – The Big Town (1987)

#25 – My Daughter’s Secret Life (2001)

 

POSTSCRIPT–I received this comment from Josh Leichner:

“Agreed…the parlaying of props to that extent….takes a lot of creative privilege…and Hollywood storytelling…..but being a bookie….in its defense….they kind of portrayed them as bets taken by a guy that looked like he would decide what action to take no matter how preposterous…..and it was in an era (early 2000s) that was void of internet betting….and just seemed like said bookie would listen to what you wanted….wrote in his little “book” and said O.K. its a “bet” with a warning telling you “its your funeral buddy”. But I can say this….. as you know…..I was the poker consultant on “Mollys Game”….. I spent 3 months on set told to correct the laziness in the script….we had a scene chalk full of short raises….string betting….and real awkward betting amounts…. I.e. the famous 1.3million pot at the flop….with a continuation bet of 100k. I’ve heard it all…..the tweets….the criticism….”you had one job…..” detailed in the attached peice….I can tell you the director wanted authenticity for sure….but vetoed me on that scene…..citing that people wouldn’t care. Well I was my job… I CARED. It was oversight and laziness. He told me only the gambling geeks would scrutinize. Wasn’t my place to say “then why not be all the way authentic”?
What i can say first hand is that…when youre on set….youre on studio time, you’ve got about 13 hours a day to get it done. Scenes are sought to be completed in one day…start to finish…with about 25 takes each so that they have a ton of clips to string together. One had perfect lighting….one shot had perfect sound….another had a great actor facial expression…..one scene strung together from 25 different takes from usually 3 angles. Thats 75 takes of the same shit…..to get one peiced together perfect scene.(or as perfect as you can get).
Now imagine all that work….with producers (the ones paying for the studio time and the crew to work) breathing down the annoying artists neck (the director) to get the job done yesterday. Script supervisor sitting there making sure lines are perfect….(who are gambling illiterate)…. my point is with all that pressure….even with the “know how” on set (me)…. at some point, when you’ve calculated the hundred degrees and different duties of care present on set, the gambling authenticity really seems like the opposite of a big deal. I CARED. I fought for it. I had ONE job…..and was often made to feel less than important in the scope of it. But since this post singles out the laziness and dismissive attitude to our craft….like my role on set with that project…..all of the sudden it seems way more important that they make it seem, and I’m so glad someone takes the time to call them out. It kind of vindicates me and my efforts.”

1 Comment

  1. thanks

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