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Posted by on Dec 28, 2022 in Blog, Essays, Las Vegas, Travel | 0 comments

What’s the Craziest Thing You’ve Seen on an Airplane?

 

 

AN UNCONVENTIONAL CONVENTION: EDITION 208

Lots of people are struggling with travel difficulties, right now. So, here’s a question that hopefully will bring a few smiles and laughs. Please help, please share, and please join the fun!

What’s the funniest/craziest/wildest thing you’ve ever seen happen on an airplane (or airport)?

Pretty simple question. Who hasn’t seen and experienced some crazy shit when flying? But instead of telling horror stories (which is okay, too), let’s try and think about the times that were funny and fun.

I’m reminded of this scene from a Nicholas Cage movie with Ben Stein:

 

I don’t have any one story that’s better than the rest. But I do have a number of amusing experiences. I used to travel a lot, so the more you fly, the more stories you probably have. Here’s one of mine, one of many:

 

I was on a Philadelphia to Las Vegas flight (it’s always the inbound Las Vegas flights) when a drunk woman boarded the plane. I was sitting at the back near the restrooms. Just as the plane was about to push back from the gate, this woman unbuckled her seat belt and hurried down the aisle to the restroom. Not good, I thought. The flight attendants came and asked the woman how much time she needed and the woman started screaming to leave her alone. This exchange goes back and forth for 3-4 minutes and the flight attendant announces the airplane can’t take off until she exits the restroom and takes a seat. Well, this sets off the other passengers as the flight was already delayed. The woman begins spewing profanities (through the door, we can hear everything). A few minutes later, one of the pilots comes back and says she needs to come out right now and take her seat. She gets even angrier and more vulgar. Finally, the crew starts banging on the door and yelling at her to come out at once. She refuses. Somebody gets on a walkie-talkie and calls a higher-up, and it’s now looking like an arrest is about to happen. By this time, the other passengers have totally lost patience and sympathy. Finally, the airport police come aboard and start banging the door with their fists. It’s been well over 10 minutes at this point and finally, the woman comes out of the bathroom acting like absolutely nothing’s wrong. Incredibly, it even looks like they might let her fly, but just as she’s being escorted up the aisle back to her seat, some of the passengers make snide remarks. This sets the woman off. Like lighting a stick of dynamite. She starts screaming, “fuck you all!” On and on. Some other passengers shout back, “sit down and shut up!” It’s become clear that security isn’t having this woman on the plane and she’s hustled up the aisle toward the exit, but then realizes her carry-on bag is still in the overhead. She goes ballistic wanting her bag. Some guy sitting about midplane has heard enough and after figuring out which bag is hers, hands it to the security guy. Then, just as she’s about to exit, she looks back and screams “I hope the fucking plane crashes!” The entire plane burst into laughter and starts applauding. The most insane thing I’ve seen on a plane.

 

Now, it’s your turn to share. Enjoy!

 

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