My Thoughts on Flying the Flag

We’re coming up on Memorial Day, and then the Fourth of July. Both will happen within the next six weeks.

Traditionally, this has been a time when Americans put aside partisan politics and differences, and look upon similarities and shared values.

Unfortunately, in the last several years, one group of people have abducted our common symbols and attempted to redefine national pride, including the flag.

The American flag — which now flies year-round in many businesses and is also affixed to cars, and even gets worn as an item of clothing — is less about celebration but now more of a bold political statement. Many American flags are even affixed to other very partisan flags which are far more divisive. Even in my city, these displays are common in many neighborhoods.

I used to fly the flag — proudly — on the date of all the appropriate holidays. But sometime around five years ago, I stopped doing so because I felt such participation would be dishonest. I took no pride in the direction of the country and found current events to be very troubling vis-a-vis what this nation is supposed to represent. Admittedly, this decision was based on personal vanity, in part — not wanting to be confused in any way as a supporter of the destructive movement that tried/tries to co-opt patriotism.

On a philosophical level, I’ve also come to the rather stark conclusion that nationalism is a scourge. It does far more harm than good — not just in this country, but everywhere its ugly head rises. While shared identity can indeed be a prideful aspiration, far too often instead nationalism subjugates others who aren’t part of the tribe prescribed by invisible man-made boundaries. Why celebrate nationalistic rituals when the shared challenges and experiences of being human are far more important? Certainly, based on my own preferences, I have much less in common with many of my fellow countrymen than I do with some citizens of other countries. And please, don’t even get me started on “American exceptionalism.”

Critics blinded by the dark shadows of their shallow myopic views will incorrectly surmise that I “hate” America. Or, they’ll sling some other slanderous accusation that only reveals their own inner insecurities. That’s not true. But I don’t love the country blindly, either. I don’t need a flag to have an identity. I don’t need to feel superior because I happen to be born on one side of an invisible line or reside on this side of an ocean to achieve satisfaction. If someone feels the need to latch on to symbols and wave flags that represent what they believe, that’s fine. But just because someone doesn’t march in the same parade does not make them any less patriotic. In some ways, and certainly in some communities where there’s great pressure to conform to tribalistic customs, it’s braver.

The last 15 months (COVID) have taught me true heroes do live among us and next to us and sometimes even die among us, too. They are health care workers, caretakers, and other dedicated people who risked their lives to help strangers. They helped millions. They saved millions of lives. Now, THAT’S patriotic. That’s something to celebrate.

This Monday, I will attend the Memorial Day tribute just as I’ve done every year since my days working in Washington for the federal government.  This time, the event will take place in my neighborhood which honors those who served and sacrificed in other ways. Yes, those who died in past battles should be remembered, and deserve to be honored, even though they are the last thing on the minds of many faux-patriot flag-wavers with giant pick-up trucks heading to the beach with coolers full of beer. I see nothing patriotic about those displays.

My views on this issue have been an evolution of awareness and a reaction to the changing society we live in, with so many flaws, hypocrisies, and injustices. My decision, always subject to change based on more evidence or life events, is one I’m comfortable with for the time being. I’m far more comfortable being honest than pretending.