Emotional Compartmentalization: Shelters from the Storm

 

 

EMOTIONAL COMPARTMENTALIZATION:
SHELTERS FROM THE STORM

This has been a rough few weeks.

If you’re a progressive, like me, you’re probably going through a similar destabilizing experience. Perhaps you’re dealing with lots of mixed emotions right now. Indeed, millions of us are desperately trying to navigate the unexpected fallout of what once seemed unthinkable. Some of that navigation is internal, and there is no such thing as a map.

My disappointment and anger cannot be be overstated. I don’t expect everyone who reads this to understand. If you don’t get it — or you don’t feel it — then please skip this post. I’m talking to those of you who share my frustration. I know, you are many.

The result of Nov. 5th was not merely political. We didn’t just lose an election. It’s much more than that. Something sadly deeper, and far more worrisome. Let me try to put it as simple as possible:

I cannot think of any other date or outcome in my lifetime so significant as to thoroughly DESTROY my faith and optimism in the people of this nation, including so many of those around me.

 

In my naivete, I thought we were better than this. But we failed the test.

Sure, eventually, more elections will happen and before you know it, 2028 will be here. But the damage (within) has already been done and it cannot be undone now, nor with an alternative outcome in the future. I can’t look at people quite the same way as I did before. I can’t admire those who I thought would do the right thing. My trust in people, the so-called “wisdom of crowds” has been violated. This isn’t a pleasant burden to bear, nor a fun emotional space to be in. Our devastation is not a choice. “What next?” isn’t a question I even care to discuss right now. It’s like, why bother? What’s the point?

This post isn’t intended as yet another political post-mortem. My purpose here is to share what I think might be both a healthy and practical way of managing these emotions and trying to continue to live and enjoy our lives in a way that’s both satisfying and purposeful.

Even while stuck in an emotional abyss, I find that *compartmentalization* works wonders. It’s like emotional magic. Focusing on other things helps immensely. If you read my writings with any frequency, you’ll see several posts about sports, wine, restaurants, entertainment, and lots of other stuff. These are things that interest me. They will always interest me. And here’s a secret — the food and wine tastes just as good as before. A winning bet is always satisfying, no matter what other troubles and worries we have, or who represents us at the highest levels of power.

Compartmentalization is not denial. I don’t even think it’s diversion. Full confession — even while writing a glowing wine review or recommending a brand of ice cream, I’m still just as disappointed and angry and that feeling inside is likely to be an irreparable wound that will never heal. However, let’s all recognize that we can’t go through life with pent up disappointment and anger all the time, because in the end it is *we* (and those around us) who end up suffering. We become prisoners to events over which we have little or no control, and I simply won’t allow that to happen. Finding peace and joy in other things isn’t just permissible, it’s MANDATORY. Especially, right now.

I don’t have any background in psychology or formal training in mental health. I have no qualifications to give anyone advice, especially when it comes to balancing one’s emotions. But I know I’m right about this. It works for me.

Let us manage ourselves more wisely. Let us enjoy what we can, while we can. Let us share those experiences and joys with others. Let us also use these positive things in our lives to deal with the inevitable negative things, both now and ahead. We must allow ourselves to smile, even while standing in the rain.

Sure, it’s okay to be disappointed and angry, just so long as we also find the time and commit ourselves to discovering so many other positive interests in life. Let these good things become the shelters from the storm.

 

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