A Different Way of Looking at Things

 

Whoever said “winning is everything” got it wrong. Very wrong.

What matters is trying. What matters is learning. What matters is enjoying. What matters is sharing.

The following short story from the life of writer Kurt Vonnegut best explains it. He wrote:

“When I was 15, I spent a month working on an archeological dig. I was talking to one of the archeologists during our lunch break and he asked those kinds of ‘getting to know you’ questions you ask young people: Do you play sports? What’s your favorite subject?

And I told him, no I don’t play any sports. I do theater, I’m in choir, I play the violin and piano, I used to take art classes. And he went WOW. That’s amazing!

And I said, ‘Oh no, but I’m not any good at ANY of them.’

And he said something then that I will never forget and which absolutely blew my mind because no one had ever said anything like it to me before:

‘I don’t think being good at things is the point of doing them. I think you’ve got all these wonderful experiences with different skills, and that all teaches you things and makes you an interesting person, no matter how well you do them.’

And that honestly changed my life. Because I went from a failure, someone who hadn’t been talented enough at anything to excel, to someone who did things because I enjoyed them. I had been raised in such an achievement-oriented environment, so inundated with the myth of Talent, that I thought it was only worth doing things if you could ‘WIN’ at them.”

Wow.  That’s perfect, isn’t it?  We are such an achievement-oriented society, and yes, I suppose that produces some good things.  But it should never dissuade, nor discourage.  I don’t write because think I can be the best writer.  That will never happen.  I write because I enjoy it.  Sometimes, I even learn things.  And who doesn’t agree that sharing is good?  I also pretty much suck at music and sports, but I still sing, and play the guitar (badly), and run each day (slowly), and try to kick field goals on fields, that I miss.  So what?

Next time you hear someone making fun of things like participation trophies or congratulating something less than victory or first-place, remember the whole point of it all.  It’s not to win, but to try.

I think Vonnegut was right about a lot of stuff. Especially this.