It’s 10:15 on a Saturday night, and I can’t find a parking space.
My restaurant of choice closes in 15 minutes. I haven’t eaten all day. I’m starving. I want Thai food. Problem is, there’s no place to park my rental car within a quarter-mile in any direction. Suddenly, I seem to get lucky.
There’s a spot! It’s empty!
Wait, not so fast.
It’s a handicapped space. Shit!
Hmm, let me think about this situation for a moment. Hey, I don’t see any handicapped people around. I mean, it’s not like someone in a wheelchair is going to show up at this late hour, right?
What should I do? What would you do?
I decided to park the car and chance it. Risking a $250 parking ticket and an automatic tow away, I calculated that the odds were darn pretty low that streets along the beach here in jam-packed Fort Lauderdale would be patrolled by police and tow trucks.
This brings up what might be called “circumstantial ethics.” When might one be justified doing something that’s clearly wrong, not to mention illegal? Of course, I would never do this in the middle of the day around a commercial center, where’s there’s some decent chance a handicapped person might need the parking space. I wonder — is it ever okay to park in a handicapped zone (that is if you’re able-bodied)?
One of my sports betting friends thinks so. He’s one of these guys who burns a tank of gas trying to find the best lines all over Las Vegas and spends more time in his car driving from casino to casino hunting for soft numbers than sleeping. Once, he was quoted in the book Sharp Sports Betting admitting he uses the handicapped spaces all the time. Why walk a half-mile when you can easily take the best parking spot? He’s only parking there for 5 or 10 minutes, anyway. Tops. “That’s what they’re there for,” he insists, trying to justify his lazy wickedness.
Somehow, I don’t think the handicapped zone is intended for a guy who wants to bet $2,000 on the Packers. But I digress. At least I’m not as evil as that guy. He’s a disgrace. I’m just hungry. He does it all the time. I’m doing it once. Then again, there always seems to be around 80 to 100 empty handicapped parking spaces in every casino garage, so maybe he’s onto something and just has more guts than the rest of us.
As I was feasting on Drunken Noodles with Chicken at Thai on the Beach (excellent, by the way), I admit to feeling some apprehension at the frustrating prospect of walking outside and finding my car towed away. I reasoned that getting a ticket and having my night ruined is probably what I deserved. Then again, it might make for a good rant. I guess it’s a win-win either way.
Well, my luck prevailed again. I returned to the car about an hour later and found it just as I’d left it. No parking ticket. No tow truck. This evil deed went unpunished. Let’s hope no handicapped person drove by seeking space, but my half-assed empathy is hardly vindication for my deed.
So, my dear readers, what would you do? Do you ever think it’s justified to use handicapped spaces? If so, when?
Postscript: The consensus is overwhelming. Based on more than 100 responses on Facebook and another death threat, it’s (almost) never permissible for an able-bodied person to park in a handicapped zone. Thanks to all who responded, even the guy who emailed that he wants to kill me.
