“We negotiate ‘priorities’ differently in this town.”
True story.
I don’t answer anonymous calls often, but sometimes one slips through. That happened Monday afternoon while I was driving and was expecting an important call. When I answered, a salesman began pitching me on getting a roof estimate. I forgot that several weeks ago I requested online information on a new roof (yeah, we need a new roof — there goes $7,000). We already found a reliable contractor to do the job, but this sales call from a different company slipped through.
Normally, I hang up on unsolicited callers, or politely say, “just a moment please,” then set the phone down and let them hang for a minute or longer until they finally give up — wasting their precious time and ensuring they’ll never call back again. But in this case, I had requested info, so there was no reason to be rude. So, the first thing that popped into my mind because I was driving to watch the Monday Night Football game was to tell the salesman that “all my money is on Cincinnati +8.5 tonight.” And, “I can’t afford the roof, unless the Bengals cover.” This is Las Vegas, after all. We negotiate “priorities” differently in this town.
Of course, I really bet the Jaguars -8.5. The line closed at -10.5. I figured, the Bengals would get their asses kicked, and I’d never hear back from the salesman again. Mission accomplished. C’mon eight-and-a-half…..daddy needs a new roof.
Boom! Cincinnati wins the game outright. In overtime. My bet was toast from the kickoff.
So, Tuesday comes and I had forgotten about the phone call from the previous day until the phone rang from the recognizable 702 number. I’m a sport about things, so I had to pick it up. “Congratulations, the Bengals won!” Suddenly, I felt like the bank robber after the dye pack explodes and taints the money. “Yeah, gee — thanks. Right, the Bengals won.”
When he brought up the real subject of getting a roofing estimate again, I had to laugh and confess my sins. Fortunately he knew enough about sports betting to go along and admitted he’d never quite dealt with a perspective customer this way. A couple of other pleasantries were exchanged and I decided there was nothing to lose by getting another estimate from his company before starting the roofing work. Who knows, maybe the company will cut me a deal because my Bengals bet lost. Anyway, the estimate is next week and the other roofing company (Tommy) is now on hold.
Only in Las Vegas.