A SHORT RANT ABOUT A LONG LINE — AND A QUICK QUESTION
A new restaurant recently opened that’s near me. It’s a counter-service, fast-food, takeout joint called “The Hat.”
The Hat is supposed to be a Los Angeles institution. But before they expanded with a new store on S. Rainbow in Las Vegas (which I believe is their first location outside of Southern California), I’d never heard of it.
Apparently, they mostly do sandwiches and offer a very limited menu. Their signature special is the pastrami sandwich (Ellen Fried — right up your alley). Again — I have no experience with them. I’m only sharing what I read about The Hat online in anticipation of the new Las Vegas location which opened last week. And honestly, most of what we read in these “foodie” columns is hype. I don’t trust hype. I’ve been burned too many times before by chummy food writers.
So — I’ll begin with a question, then get to my rant. Is The Hat really that good? I mean, it’s a sandwich spot. When I worked at the old Binion’s Horseshoe, we had a casino-floor deli that served the best pastrami sandwiches in the city (and the beef brisket would knock your socks off, too). That was the gold standard to me, and now 25 years later, I wonder — is The Hat really that big of a deal?
These LA “institutions” have not done well here across the state line, despite many SoCal transplants now living in Las Vegas. Pinks (hot dogs) was total garbage. Rubbish. Dupars was massively disappointing. Overpriced! I don’t think Randy’s Donuts is all that good. In fact, most famous restaurants in their original cities do *not* translate well into new geographies. True for NYC, LA, and TEXAS. There are exceptions, of course. But they are very rare.
Today, I thought Monday afternoon would be an ideal time to try The Hat. So, we drive over and arrived about 1:30 pm–which is after any lunch rush. Gulp! Well, I couldn’t believe what I saw. The car drive-thru line was probably 40-50 cars long. They had sunburned teenagers out in that blistering sun with tablets. I can’t even imagine. On a Monday! No biggie. We planned to dine inside, anyway.
So, we got out of the car and the line to get inside was so many people they were piled outside the door and around the corner. There was even a white tent outside to handle the overflow. Triage. The line time was estimated at 25 minutes, someone said. Then, who knows if seating was available inside. Like a hospital emergency room at clusterfuck general. Oh, and it was 102 degrees with the sun and heat blazing down on those dumb and desperate enough to stand in that chain-gang line.
It’s a SANDWICH SHOP, people!
Lines for stuff that’s not really that big a deal fry my ass. I’m impatient. I don’t care if the food was FUCKING FREE and it was Chateaubriand with 24K gold feather dust. There’s NO WAY I’m standing in a goddamned meat-wagon line that long. I’m not flying Spirit Airlines here. I’m trying to order a Pastrami on Rye with a bag of onion rings, okay?
I don’t get people waiting in lines to fork over their money and blowing 90 minutes on a fast food meal that should be half that time, tops! And, I sure as hell ‘aint waiting in an overheating car with the AC blasting with gas is $5.35 a gallon and it might take longer to wait in the car line than to wolf down my meal.
Not happening!
I’ll give The Hat another chance sometime. I’m not sure when. But I’d like to know from others if it’s really worth it. I’ll have to be clever and navigate a time when all the clock busters and fume breathers are not blocking my hunger and happiness. Then again, who knows when that might be — especially given this “announcement” that the joint CUTS OFF the line at midnight.
This is a fast food joint, people! They make sandwiches! W.T.F.? !!!
Educate me please.
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Note: We ended up eating at a Thai place 2 minutes away. There are probably 50-60 restaurants within a 5 minute drive of The Hat and we sure weren’t waiting in those lines!