Question: Why would anyone want to sit on a terribly uncomfortable backless chair with your feet propped off the ground?
Hightop tables and chairs are the worst, stupidest, most impractical, torturous, inexplicable invention in the entire history of humankind. Worse than DDT, fake black hair sprays, hydrogen blimps, pop-up ads, clip-on neckties, and Country Crock.
All high-top tables and chairs should be gathered and then burned in a giant bonfire while we all link arms and sing “Celebration.”
The problem is, they’re everywhere. An invasion. Bars. Restaurants. Casinos. Ice cream parlors. Sportsbooks. They’re like a Kardashian version of furniture: Everybody hates them but they just won’t fucking go away.
What gets me is — why would anyone want to sit on a terribly uncomfortable backless chair with your feet propped off the ground? What purpose is possibly served by raising my meal, my beer, and my ass 12 inches straight up into the air teetering on four-leg stool matchsticks?What’s the point of this insanity?
High-top tables and chairs don’t save on space. They are heavy, which means bulky. And whoever decided to make any chair without a back for support deserves to be tortured on a rack and boiled in molten lead.
I’m hereby launching a boycott against HIGH-TOP TABLES AND CHAIRS. Barstools, I totally get that. There’s a reason for barstools, which belong at, you guessed it, a BAR. But high-tops…..no.
Never!
This madness must end.