I don’t understand the appeal of strip clubs. Somebody, explain this to me.
Strip clubs are obviously popular, not just in Las Vegas, but just about everywhere. When I travel around the country, wherever I go, I’m amazed at how many strip clubs there are. Parking lots are usually full at all hours, day and night.
There’s probably a joke in there somewhere as to why I would notice so many strip clubs and the number of cars in parking lots. Truth is, there are so many clubs around, that it’s impossible not to notice them.
I haven’t been inside a strip club in several years. The last time I spent anytime at all in them with regularity was when I was in my early 20’s. But that was all just an excuse to go out with friends and drink beer. It was a rite of passage. That said, one would think most people eventually grow out of that adolescent stage.
But many people I talk to enjoy going out to strip clubs for reasons I just can’t comprehend. To me, paying money to sit in a dark place so you can watch naked female flesh parading non-stop in front of your eyes is absurdly ridiculous. It’s sort of like going out to a fancy restaurant, ordering a $50 steak, and then be forced to sit there and stare at it all night long. I mean, what’s the fucking point? Who would enjoy doing something like that?
Guys who frequent strip clubs are essentially staring at “ribeyes” for hours. Sometimes the juicy “tenderloin” dances right in front of their faces. But they’ll never make it past the appetizer course. To me, that’s not entertainment. That’s torture!
Fact: None of the guys who go to strip clubs are going to get laid. Period. End of discussion. Not with the stripper anyway. I know some guys who think they’re “special.” Well, there’s only one word I can say to that: Bullshit. You aren’t special. Let’s see how much time the stripper spends once she realizes the guy is broke. That guy becomes about as popular as a case of herpes in a brothel.
Those of you who read these essays know I’m not a prude. I don’t care what people do, so long as it doesn’t hurt others. I don’t oppose strip clubs on moral grounds, although it’s baffling to me how these clip joints are somehow legal just about everywhere you go, you still somehow can’t play a hand of poker on the Internet in 47 states. Someone, please explain that to me. But I digress.
I’m all for having fun. I’m all for people exercising their individual freedom. I’m all for sex. I even favor legalized prostitution, which isn’t really a big deal in Nevada (or most of Europe for that matter). At least there’s some sensory satisfaction in that. But a strip club?
The notion of forking over a cover charge, getting lousy service, paying for overpriced drinks just for the sole purpose of watching (while not touching) naked women streaming across a stage seems pretty pointless to me.
It seems the much wiser thing is to have your steak, and eat it too. Who knows? Maybe there’s even room for dessert.
READ: X-Rated Curiosity