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Posted by on May 4, 2022 in Blog, Essays, What's Left | 2 comments

A Message to Men Who Oppose Legalized Abortion

 

 

It’s going to be so much fun watching men against abortion bitch and moan about paying child support.

Hey guys, get ready to pay up!

I’m talking about CHILD SUPPORT PAYMENTS.

Playing the field and chasing tail is about to get lots more risky and expensive, and it has nothing to do with the rate of inflation. “Getting lucky” will take on a whole new meaning.

But some of you guys won’t be so lucky. Those one-night stands, those flings, those youthful indiscretions, those office romances are going to produce — how shall I put this? — some “unanticipated consequences.”

Inevitably, women are going to get pregnant, be forced to give birth, and now YOU will share the responsibility.

Whooops!

Since that baby you joyously spawned in a brief moment of passion will now be carried to full term by law (thanks Republicans!), the responsibility will be YOURS! Congratulations! You’re going to be a dad!

Just think of the joy of that encounter on the first every month over the next 18 years when it’s time to write a big fat check. No, there won’t be ANY excuses. You WILL pay. Each and EVERY month. It won’t matter if the condom broke, or her birth control failed, or if you simply couldn’t control your passion in the heat of the moment. YOU made that little bundle of joy. Now, prepare to PAY for it.

It won’t matter that you met the mother at a frat party, or in a bar late one night, or you had a one-time fling with a co-worker. When she reveals her surprise in a text, it will be like hitting the anti-lottery. Ding! Ding! Ding! You just lost $200,000 in future income. Never mind that you can’t even remember the woman’s name, the mother of your child. Remember, it’s a child, not a choice — right? Now, be a good daddy and go get your checkbook.

That mind-blowing orgasm is going to end up costing you a fortune. And here’s another thought: If you don’t pay up, then authorities will garnish your wages, and if you still don’t pay, you’ll be locked up as a deadbeat dad.

So enjoy!

__________

Read more of my reaction to the SCOTUS overturning Row v. Wade HERE.

2 Comments

  1. You obviously haven’t heard the term “wrap it up!”

    • NOLAN REPLIES:

      So, why the fuck are you here? If your attention span is like a gnat, then go get your “education” from a meme.

      Dipshit.

      — ND

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